Mobile Tele'phoney'
I am amazed at the strides taken by technology in bettering the lives of the people across the globe in the past decade. One of the most interesting objects that technology has given is the communication tool called mobile phone. Now this is the major subject of everyone's life. One can dare to go out without dress but cannot venture out without mobile. It has become part of the body.
While I have no questions on the convenience of having a mobile, I just find it funny to observe the way a mobile is used, misused, disused, overused and abused by most of the people. The sense of being in open is dying for most individuals on several counts.
I have come across different types of people using the mobile and my experience has taught me to classify them in the following ways:
1. The walkie-talkies - these mobile users are least bothered about the traffic rules. For them, there does not exist the one-ways or busy junctions or the highways. They just keep walking while talking and some of them have either taken lives or given theirs. For them IDEA is the big motivator and walk while they talk. They are not aware that their idea can change our life.
2. The show-casers - these mobile users would like to show to the world how to talk over phone by flashing their mobiles which are generally costly. They will be looking all around while talking just to make sure their mobile is being noticed.
3. The loud-speakers - they actually do not need the mobile for the person on the other end to listen to them. Their voice is enough to break the ear drums of people around them.
4. The silencers - their own ears cannot listen to what they are speaking over phone. One may wonder if they are speaking at all. They deserve to work for the CIA.
5. The dust-binners - all that they have to speak to the other person is nothing but the crap that you as a bystander would not like to overhear. Remember the UNINOR advertisement.
6. The time-killers - they have nothing else to do and so they pick up one contact from the phone list to kill his time and also their own. You will most of the time hear them say ' what else' repeatedly to the frustrated other end.
7. The hard-pressers - no matter what work they have with the mobile, you will find them pressing some button or the other on their mobile for no fault of the hapless instrument.
8 The jugglers - they treat their mobile like a ball in the hand. They will keep juggling it or playing around with it until either a call lands or they are bored with the act.
9. The tensioners - they are the ones who frequently take out the mobile from the pocket and see if they have missed out on a call or a message.
10. The imitators - they cannot afford to buy the real ones and so end up buying the imitations which in most cases not only look original but work like the ones. You cannot imagine the happiness in their faces when the fellows near them take the fake one for real.
11. The linkers - they keep shifting the phone between the mouth and the ear while speaking. It appears they are tying the ear to the mouth.
12. The multi speakers - One mobile is not sufficient for them and so have more than two. They end up listening on phone and answering on the other.
13. The blasters - Their neighbourhood turns out to be a music show as they keep playing the songs in high volume without giving a damn about what others think. The world should listen to what they play.
14. The welders - they do not waste their time and are also great fete masters. You will generally find them driving two wheelers with the mobile welded to one of the ears. One such welder had in fact lost his life while doing this fete in my native city Vijayawada.
15. The traffic masters - They drive the car while on a mobile call and are at their own pace on the road. Honking does not deter them and you can never overtake them. The traffic signals do not exist for them. Even an ambulance has to wait till they complete talking on mobile.
There can be no end to this classification as new users emerge and innovate on newer ways of (ab)using the mobile.
For now, it is fun and fun all the way until the situation gets out of control for all of us.
While I have no questions on the convenience of having a mobile, I just find it funny to observe the way a mobile is used, misused, disused, overused and abused by most of the people. The sense of being in open is dying for most individuals on several counts.
I have come across different types of people using the mobile and my experience has taught me to classify them in the following ways:
1. The walkie-talkies - these mobile users are least bothered about the traffic rules. For them, there does not exist the one-ways or busy junctions or the highways. They just keep walking while talking and some of them have either taken lives or given theirs. For them IDEA is the big motivator and walk while they talk. They are not aware that their idea can change our life.
2. The show-casers - these mobile users would like to show to the world how to talk over phone by flashing their mobiles which are generally costly. They will be looking all around while talking just to make sure their mobile is being noticed.
3. The loud-speakers - they actually do not need the mobile for the person on the other end to listen to them. Their voice is enough to break the ear drums of people around them.
4. The silencers - their own ears cannot listen to what they are speaking over phone. One may wonder if they are speaking at all. They deserve to work for the CIA.
5. The dust-binners - all that they have to speak to the other person is nothing but the crap that you as a bystander would not like to overhear. Remember the UNINOR advertisement.
6. The time-killers - they have nothing else to do and so they pick up one contact from the phone list to kill his time and also their own. You will most of the time hear them say ' what else' repeatedly to the frustrated other end.
7. The hard-pressers - no matter what work they have with the mobile, you will find them pressing some button or the other on their mobile for no fault of the hapless instrument.
8 The jugglers - they treat their mobile like a ball in the hand. They will keep juggling it or playing around with it until either a call lands or they are bored with the act.
9. The tensioners - they are the ones who frequently take out the mobile from the pocket and see if they have missed out on a call or a message.
10. The imitators - they cannot afford to buy the real ones and so end up buying the imitations which in most cases not only look original but work like the ones. You cannot imagine the happiness in their faces when the fellows near them take the fake one for real.
11. The linkers - they keep shifting the phone between the mouth and the ear while speaking. It appears they are tying the ear to the mouth.
12. The multi speakers - One mobile is not sufficient for them and so have more than two. They end up listening on phone and answering on the other.
13. The blasters - Their neighbourhood turns out to be a music show as they keep playing the songs in high volume without giving a damn about what others think. The world should listen to what they play.
14. The welders - they do not waste their time and are also great fete masters. You will generally find them driving two wheelers with the mobile welded to one of the ears. One such welder had in fact lost his life while doing this fete in my native city Vijayawada.
15. The traffic masters - They drive the car while on a mobile call and are at their own pace on the road. Honking does not deter them and you can never overtake them. The traffic signals do not exist for them. Even an ambulance has to wait till they complete talking on mobile.
There can be no end to this classification as new users emerge and innovate on newer ways of (ab)using the mobile.
For now, it is fun and fun all the way until the situation gets out of control for all of us.
Hilarious, but thought-provoking. Why don't people think of these. A. Saye Sekhar
ReplyDeleteTen days back one Girl(ady) (could not judge she was a young girl or lady) - was talking in her mobile on the middle of the road in Adayar when a car blows the horn, - she was not bothering and finally the driver finds his way using 'unparlimentary words' and drove - but she did'nt bother his comments. A L V Moorthy
ReplyDeleteKiran, kudos to your research and the way you nail them.
ReplyDeleteYou have missed on few though,
The missed call specialist, the one who will give half a ring and cut the call.
The game masters, the ones who still need to know that their mobile can also make calls, but are experts on every game on their handset.
Perennial chargers, these guys have a strange body language, first thing they got to do whenever they are resting for two minutes in plug their mobile into the nearest wall socket and then change their body form to be able to speak with the limitation of being stuck to a wall socket.
Sim Changers, you will find them with an album of SIM cards, you will find them busy like the Pan wallah always, they keep changing the SIM cards in that very abused looking handset.